Next Step: Lottery Ticket.


If I was rich, I’d still take the bus.

No, really, I would. I’d still live in Newcastle, I’d still wear Adidas kicks, and I’d still take the bus. You’d buy a Ferrari? Motherfucker, people are starving, buy a Ford Focus like everyone else.

I was out in town today with my good friend Jon, taking photos around the city. We got into a conversation about what we would do if we were rich. Like, Oprah rich. We both basically agreed we’d change the world. I mean, after we’ve bought a place to live, and Jon has a new bass. Actually, I wouldn’t mind a new bass too. But after that, and after working out how much money we’d need to live comfortably, we’d give the rest away.

We said we’d write about this on our blogs, since Jon is just starting out with blogging and liked the idea of having a focus on what to write about. You can read his post here– his idea of touring the world on his bike giving away money is brilliant. Here is mine:

If I was rich, I would…

1. Pay for the West Memphis Three’s defence lawyers.

This is just something that’s close to my heart. If you don’t know who the WM3 are, educate yourselves, you’ll thank yourself for it. These people need the help of others, and this is a crucial time for their cases.

2. Build the SOPHIE charity centre.

I heard in an interview once that Sylvia Lancaster, Sophie Lancaster’s mam, would love to build a drop in centre for kids who are feeling bullied just for being who they are. I love that idea, so I’d pay for it all if I was rich.


3. Create jobs in a struggling third world community.

I could volunteer, but why should I? Self righteous middle class students who volunteer in third world countries are basically taking away a job that a starving person could have, by offering to do it for free. What starving communities need is something which is sustainable, where they can do the work they need to for the money which will put food in their families’ mouths. I have no idea how I’d create something like that, but if I was rich I could pay someone smarter than me to figure that all out. Give a man a fish and he’ll eat for a day- but if you give that man an opportunity to make something of his skills, he’ll be a proud man who can feed his whole family for years (and won’t have to eat nothing but fish!).


4. Give Seaton Burn a drum kit.

This one’s sort of small, but charity begins at home, right? When I was a kid in high school, I learned how to play the drums. I doubt I ever once hit a skin which didn’t have duct tape on it. The kit fell apart at almost every attempt to move it into the theatre to play after school with friends, too. There are kids who still take drum lessons there on that kit, and it’s ridiculous. Giving those in charge money doesn’t make a difference, so I’d just buy the drum kit. Try to buy a computer with that, fuckers. I’d also buy guitars which have six strings on them, because there are none in Seaton Burn.


5. Give a home to Steve.

If you’re from Newcastle, you’ve probably seen Steve. Steve is the man who sells the Big Issue on the corner of Milligans on Northumberland Street in town. I’ve only really spoken to him a few times, but he’s one of the nicest people I’ve met. Every time I see him, he’s been nothing but genuine and polite, while those in suits around him treat him like shit. If I could afford it, I’d give him a home, no doubt about it.

I’d probably do loads of other things if I was massively rich, but there are five things I’d do. My post is already longer than Jon’s, and I haven’t even got to my pictures yet, haha.

Oh yeah so we took pictures. We went down the Quayside today to do it, for a challenge! Ooooo, I do love a challenge. Today’s seemed simple: go to the Quayside, but don’t take a photo of the Tyne or Millennium bridge and automatically think you’re a photographer like most bell ends with cameras. Since the bridges are so big, it’s harder than you think. You’re really forced to look around you, which is great until you realise you’ve taken five pictures of the same thing.


In the end, while I was next to the Sage, I gave in and literally turned my back to the river. Doing so enabled us to find this:


And this:


And some other amazing pictures I’ll treat you with another time (it’s almost 2.30 AM here, I am sleepy).

Oh go on then, I’ll admit it now…


Stupid fucking massive bridge.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s